So, yesterday, our yoga instructor tried to kill my parents and I by making us stay in the reverse triangle pose for close to an eternity. Last month she tried to kill me by making my forehead touch the ground while I was in the downward- facing dog position. (Owwww.....!) (Crazy biatch.) Then she tried to turn us against roast beef and lamb chops to be........... Vegetarians. Meat apparently “clogs your thinking”. (What the..................... Hell?????) My mom was a complete sell out! (Saw that coming.) My dad and I stood our ground, though. We know exactly how we feel about meat.
Then we went to see my grandmother. (My dad's mom.) She's kind of very fat and her muscles are degenerating, which makes walking very challenging for her. She requires like, 7 people and a wheelchair to move around. We lack the manpower to care for her properly at home, so she had to go live in a nursing home a couple of months back. I go to see her every weekend, but she never remembers my face. (I don't blame her.) The place is filled with old people who sit around all day because no one really remembers to spend time with them and I think some are embarrassed to ask people to spend time with them. It makes me sad on some days.
Not so much yesterday, because my grandmother wouldn’t stop telling me that I had lizard shit on my face. (My monroe piercing.) Clearly, the Silent Generation doesn’t appreciate body modification. She told me at least 15 times. I can't tell if it was her dementia or witty personality. My family likes to poke fun repeatedly until someone cries. (I'm usually someone.)
Kinda bored right now. Shaun totally forgets that I’m alive while he is conning strangers into purchasing laptop computers from him. I'm gonna get into the shower now because we're having dinner out. (Our home kitchen is closed on weekends.) Hope you guys had a great weekend. Ta!
